Just Because I Have It Does’t Mean I Want It

I’ve never known what I truly wanted in life, but I’ve always been able to keep track of what I’ve lost in life and felt it deeply — to the point where it seems to have created an illusion that just because I had something I wanted it.

So it begs the question…

Just because I have something does it mean I have what I want?

I most certainly have believed, more times than I would care to admit, that because I have something I have what I want.

Why else would I have it?

Well… most things I’ve had, I did not deeply want, they just were the first chance, the first idea or the first person I attached myself to in order to feel safe in the world.

So it begs a second question…

What am I still holding onto just because I have it, because it makes me feel safe in the world — and not because I deeply want it?